Whoah Dudes and Dudettes, (Cough, Cough) like get a load of this man. There's like these scientist dudes man at some school I think called Scripps or whatever. Cough! And they were all partying down heavy and somebody said like Hey!, I'll bet this chronic could like really get some old folks messed up man.
And so like a couple of them, (cough), like dosed these little old ladies and looked at their brains with like a microscope or something while they were high. Whoa trippy huh? And you know what dudes? They found that like their brains that used to be all shriveled up and useless and stuff were like fixed and now they could remember stuff! Awesome!
Check it out Man, I learned some new words! Wait a minute I wrote em on my arm. Here they are. Okay, theres umh delta 9 tetrahydracannabinol or THC and this stuff is the same stuff, (cough, cough, cough), that makes the chronic like chronic man.
Medical Marijuana Patients Still Get Drug Tested
After smoking marijuana I was drug tested, twice. I used synthetic urine and passed the urine analysis, but hey..why I am drug tested if I have a medical marijuana card?
In the united states, people still get drug tested at work even if they are eligible for MMJ card. Smoking marijuana is medicine for me. Why I am criminalzed?
If you are looking for more information on synthetic urine, drug testing and how to pass one, even with THC in your system, then check out this blog.
And like it's like an army of little soldier dudes that like block this bunch of stoners called acetylcholine neurotransmitters, (Whoa check out that word dude), from getting too broken down and blowing a good party you know what I mean?, (Cough),
And like that gives these old people like the munchies and they eat more and they remember important stuff like where's the bong? And stuff!
Radical huh?, (Cough! Cough!). Check this out man. Like that alzheimers stuff is some bad shit man. It makes people have like no memory, (Whoah!), and they're like not motivated and can't concentrate, (Heavy!), and they get all confused and stuff.
Whoa! Hit the deck man! You know what I just thought of dude?, (Cough! Hack! Cough), Like isn't that the same symptoms of toking down on some really good killer green bud? No Way! So like the cure has like the same symptoms as the disease? Dig that!
Man, I need to get hooked up with some of that stuff them scientists are smoking man. (Cough!). Whoa! Them dudes gotta be smashed man! Cha! How can I get a job like that man? I could like totally study stoned people man! I stared at my friend Beamer for hours one time!
This is so cool! I knew there was like something to this whole quest for a higher education business. Wait'll I tell my folks. They're, (Cough! Cough!) gonna be so proud of me man!
(Disclaimer: Although all the scientific facts in this story are true, I had help writing this article from my thirteen year old son. He is in so much trouble.)
And again, do not let your employer terrorize you, if you are a medical marijuana patient with legit MMJ card, then you have the right to smoke weed, you should not be drug tested at work.
But if they force you, just use synthetic urine, detox drink or drug detox pills to fool their stupid system and pass that drug test.